All I Need To Know About Life

I Learned From My Dog!!

1.    If you stare at someone long enough, eventually you’ll get what you want.

2.    When it comes to having sex, if at first you don’t succeed, beg.

3.    Don’t go out without I.D.

4.    Be direct with people; let them know exactly how you feel by peeing on their shoes.

5.    Be aware of when to hold your tongue, and when to use it.

6.    Leave room in your schedule for a good nap.

7.    Always give people a friendly greeting — a cold nose in the crotch is effective.

8.    When you do something wrong, always take responsibility for it (as soon as you’re dragged out from under the bed).

9.    If it’s not wet and sloppy, it’s not a real kiss.

10. If my dog doesn’t like or trust a person, I shouldn’t either.

11. Never hesitate to take a moment to roll around in the grass and enjoy the moment.